This much can be said of the latest WikiLeaks dump that began hitting the Internet tonight: Relations between the United States and Liechtenstein are still probably as they ever were, very much intact and harmonious.

Now to the rest of the dirt in the of the 251,287 leaked cables and State Department directives, just part of the trove of three million documents that comprise a leak seven times greater than the Iraq war documents published by WikiLeaks in October. Here are some of the bits in the cables that are catching the most attention so far:

• Russian President Dmitry Medvedev “plays Robin to [Vladimir] Putin’s Batman”
• North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il is a “flabby old chap”
• French President Nicolas Sarkozy is a “naked emperor”
• Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi is “feckless” and “vain”
• Afghan President Hamid Karzai is “an extremely weak man” and paranoid
• Zimbabwean strongman Robert Mugabe is “the crazy old man”

And not all of it is the opinion of U.S. diplomats, but passing along what one leader may have said about another leader. For example, Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak is said to have called Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu “elegant and charming” but a guy who doesn’t keep his promises, and an adviser to Sultan Qaboos of Oman called Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi “just strange” — while other U.S. cables detail that Gadhafi has a “hot blonde” Ukrainian nurse, which comes as no surprise when you take into account his female bodyguard squad.

But it’s not all about talking smack. Sheikh bin Zayed of Abu Dhabi, for example, is said to believe “a near term conventional war with Iran is clearly preferable to the long term consequences of a nuclear armed Iran.” Saudi King Abdullah also urged a U.S. attack on Iran.

“In another [cable], US diplomats reveal that the attempt to persuade different countries to accept Guantanamo inmates turned into a downright bazaar, with offers of accepting prisoners being made in exchange for development aid or a visit by President Barack Obama,” Der Spiegel, one of the media outlets given an advance look at the documents, writes. The Guardian, another outlet with advanced access, simply goes with the headline, “US embassy cables leak sparks global diplomatic crisis.” And this explains why Washington was furiously contacting other governments, trying to mop up the damage before the leaked documents were even unveiled.

Another allegation from the documents, that State Department staff were instructed by Hillary Clinton to spy on United Nations staffers and get info such as credit-card and frequent-flyer numbers, was hotly denied by the State Department on Sunday evening. “Contrary to some #Wikileaks’ reporting, our diplomats are diplomats,” State Department spokesman P.J. Crowley tweeted. “They are not intelligence assets.”

Who is the man behind the organization behind publishing the leaks? Read more about Julian Assange here.

(Photo by Dan Kitwood/Getty Images)